We’ve all heard it. The woman who acts out irrationally due to a “falling out” with a romantic interest. But in the midst of an emotional crisis, I’m left wondering, is EVERYONE (I mean every goddamn person) capable of becoming a crazy bitch?
All my friends and my therapist Berry knows that I don’t like dealing with feelings and am a very logical person. I try to remove my minimal emotions from situations and deal with life from a very pragmatic perspective. This is why it’s difficult for me to process the myth of the crazy bitch and how it applies to me.
Recently, I’ve been dealing with a boy who I’m super into but due to weird circumstances and he asked for a “break”. And I was left asking these questions:
- WTF constitutes a break?
- Do I have to apologize for something I didn’t think was that big of a deal and wrong?
- How and to what extent did I fuck this up?
- Can we still be friends?
The worst part of this is that nobody has the goddamn answers except for that boy and it’s what starts the crazy.
This is how my brain turns into Jekyll and Hyde:
- Logical Jae, “All I can do is give him space, don’t expect anything, and accept the outcome whatever it may be.”
- Crazy Bitch Jae, “So like is three weeks plenty of time before I reach out? Do you think he’s thinking of me? Is he talking to other people? Does he think I’m a crazy bitch?”
Logical Jae is wise beyond her years and does what she always does, living her best life and being productive regardless of a boy. Crazy Bitch Jae dwells on these dumb feelings and mopes over the fact that it could be her fault and has set in her mind she’ll be alone forever. It was earlier today I realized this pattern I have after every failed fling or weird dating mishaps: Logical Jae and Crazy Bitch Jae are always at odds and there’s always a point I reach where Logical Jae kicks in 200% and makes sure Crazy Bitch Jae GTFO.
Everyone is capable of doing stupid shit, but everyone is also capable of letting go and moving on with their lives. I’ve heard some shady ass shit where someone slashes someone’s tires for rejection, where someone spread rumors about the other person, throws out all the other person’s belongings when they ain’t there, etc. All this stuff is like SOOOOOO EXTRA. If you’re not at that level, you fine. As my wise friend Ari said, don’t give the other person too much power, that only leads to setting yourself up for failure.
So the myth of the crazy bitch isn’t completely debunked but I can confidently say that EVERYONE is capable of becoming the crazy bitch if they are pushed far enough but also has the strength to not if they have logic, dignity, and know their self-worth.